BREAKING NEWS!

So I'm finally near a computer when something totally insane happens to me. I'm at work right now and this story is about 10 mintues old....You're never gonna believe this....

So I taught seven classes today. Generally it's a pretty tough schedule for Fridays, but it didn't get interesting until my last class. My last class is a pre-middle school class, so they're about 12 years old. I was teaching away as usual and one student said, "Teacher, Bathroom." "Wait." I said. Since all students usually ask to go to the bathroom a few times per class it wasn't out of the ordinary. She had a discheveled look on her face, but accepted my response. Once we finished reading the paragraph that we were in the middle of I let her go, even though the school wants us to keep students in the room during class time.

So off to the bathroom she goes. Only as she passed by did I get a raunchy whiff of outhouse. Naturally I assumed that she had farted and left it in the room for all of us to enjoy. Wrong. When she returned back to the class about 10 mintues later I noticed a giant brownish yellow smear on the back of her white pants. Yes, she chose white pants on this blissful day. The smell returned with her and immediately after I saw the poo stain on her pants I froze. I didn't know what to do about it. I didn't want to further embarass her, so I let her go back to her seat. I mean, these problems are tough enough to deal with, let alone in a second language.

After the class ended, I returned to the teachers office to talk to the Korean teacher who would follow my class. I told her that one student looked particularly "sick" and I tried to explain what happened. Again the language barrier cursed me. "Um, Sujin, one student...pooed (wait, that's slang), umm she sh* (crap, slang again)...she ddong'ed (ddong=korean word for poo) her pants. Or I guess I could have tried "Hey Sujin your student released fecal matter into the seat of her pants. How would that have gone over? The look on Sujins face was the horror that I had anticipated. She wasn't sure what to do just as I would. How do you approach a conservative, quiet, well behaved, studious Korean girl about how she just crapped herself?

Frick. I'm just glad it's Friday AND a long weekend.